I consider myself to be a creative, spontaneous person. I used to think that setting goals were more for super smart, super organized people, and it seemed too complicated and time-consuming. Whenever I heard people talk about setting goals, I thought it was not for me. I didn’t have the right planners, the right lists or the right formulas.
What I didn’t realize is that setting goals can be fun and exciting. I began to learn that goals are the mile markers that urge you along on the way to achieving your God-given dreams. Setting your goals do not have to be hard or time-consuming, but they are vital in moving you from where you are now to where you want to be in the future. You can begin setting your goals using these four simple steps:
Step 1: Clarify Your Desires
Don’t be afraid of your desires, because they are linked with your specific purpose. God has placed these desires in your heart and He wants to be the one to fulfill them.
Step 2: Identify Your Roles and Goals
Identify your roles, which can include but are not limited to being a mother, wife, husband, father, friend, artist, creator, etc. Right next to the roles you have identified, write one specific, simple goal. Written goals are meant to be clear, specific, and have a date of desired accomplishment.
Step 3: Write them down
There is so much power in writing things down. The bible tells us to write the vision and make it plain, so that people can see it and run with it. Furthermore, there was an amazing study done at the Dominican University by Gail Matthews which showed that the very act of people writing down their goals increased their chances of accomplishing them by 42%. Can you imagine writing your goals down and experiencing almost a 50% greater chance of achieving them?
Step 4: Make them Visible
Something powerful happens when you keep your roles, goals, and desires before you and keep your eyes focused on where you want to go. The bible even talks about keeping His word before our eyes. However, this is the one step where many people skip over it or miss it altogether and they often do not achieve their goals because they simply don’t keep them visible. I used to just write my goals, put them in a drawer, and never think about them again. When I began to make them visible, I thought about them more often and made steps to accomplish them.
These roles and goals, these desires that you have burning in your heart have been put there by God, so dignify them by placing them before your eyes and keeping them visible. What you hold before your eyes is going to be what shows up in your life. When you take some time, even if it’s only fifteen minutes or so, and you sit down and go over these four steps, I guarantee you that it is going to make a difference in achieving your goals and desires.
If we were alone in a dark alley, in you asked me what I thought…I would tell you to start a blog.
Why? Because there isn’t a shorter route to learning discipline, learning the craft, and discovering who you are—than blogging.
It distills your voice, sharpens your passions, puts you in the drivers seat to tell us what YOU really think. It clarifies your calling, teaches you introspection and give you a place—free from censorship or committee-votes to say it how you want to say to it. To convey it how you want to convey it. And best of all?
You act in service to your fellowman.
For those who choose to wield the tool of blogging as a means to inspire, educate and pay forward the hard earned wisdom of their trials—the rewards are unending and the joy infinite.
In a word: you give. And become changed in the giving.
—How to Launch a Blog in 5 Minutes—
1.Get a hosting provider. A web host is where your website “lives.” You own it, but you pay a small fee to keep it online (kind of like paying property taxes to the government). I recommend Bluehost for only $3.49/month. It’s one of the most popular web hosts on the Internet, it’s recommended by all the experts (I’ve done the research) and offers excellent, 24/7 customer service.
2. Register a domain. You can get a domain name (e.g. eileenwilder.com) through your hosting company. I recommend doing it this way, so you can keep everything streamlined. With Bluehost, this service is free with a hosting plan (as opposed to paying extra through a service like Godaddy.com). If you’ve already registered a domain through another service and need to host it, you’ll either have to transfer your domain registration or point your name servers to the host (here’s a video on how to do that).
3. Install WordPress. Blogging requires software, and the best that I’ve found is WordPress. It’s easy, quick, and best of all, free. You can set up WordPress through your host (Bluehost does this for you for free!). Otherwise, you have to go through WordPress.org to download the software and then upload it to a host. (Note: Using WordPress.org is different from signing up for a free blog at WordPress.com. This infographic explains how.)
4. Get a theme. When you start using WordPress, you get access to a bunch of beautiful blog designs (called “themes”), many of which are free. For those just getting started, I recommend Twenty Seventeen; it’s a simple, elegant theme. If you don’t mind spending a bit more, I can’t recommend the Divi Theme from Elegant Themes, it literally makes me excited every time I see it, see someone else with that theme—or play around customizing mine.
5. Log in and start blogging. You’ll want to bookmark the the URL (website address) for your dashboard, so you can find it easily. It is yourblogname.com/wp-admin/. Once logged in, click “Posts” on the left-hand sand, and then select “Add New.” Write a title and create some content for your new blog, and you are off on your new adventure!
“Could you kindly move your behind please?”
“What was … that?” I exclaimed, spinning around to address the voice. It was then I realized my rear end was in the way, keeping the man from his table. Recognizing the hilarity of the situation, we both erupted in laughter, causing looks of irritation from those grabbing lunch around us.
Having just delivered my third child, I was 60 pounds over my normal weight. In my present state, I was unaware of my new body dimensions. Granted, my bottom was much rounder than normal, but in a strange phenomenon unique to childbearing, it had also grown horizontally.
It was as if a small shelf was now attached to my backside.
Why— the man could have rested his coffee on my behind if he had wanted to!
In that moment, it was as if time stood still. The lyric of the laughter, the aghast look on the gentleman’s face—life played in surreal slow motion as I contemplated:
…I hadn’t always been as kind to my body as I was being now.
In fact, we had been vicious enemies for over two decades.
The moment lasted only seconds, but within the sound of the laughter was the echo of my freedom. I recognized something profound in this corner bistro, something that had eluded me throughout my youth:
I had finally made peace with my behind.
When what lies “behind” you is disappointment with your weight or frustration that you just can’t seem to move forward—it’s easy to let what’s behind you, define you.
Statistics show 8 out of 10 of us feel insecure about our bodies. In fact, 97% of women have this thought each day— “I hate my body.”
I remember as a 20-year-old, I had been so long involved with disordered eating that I began to believe disorder was my future.
I couldn’t imagine a world where I would wake up and not obsess about my body or what I was eating.
I couldn’t imagine living light and free, devoid of the aching insecurity and depression that had become my constant companions.
I desperately wanted to experience a different reality, but I had no idea how.
My big behind was in the way.
It was as if there lay a chasm between who I longed to be—healthy, radiant, secure, confident—and who I saw in the mirror. All I saw was a girl—overweight, unstable, with a side of cray-cray.
Finally, after a doctor said I would “never get pregnant” if I continued this path of disordered eating, I dug into the Word, and into restorative teaching. I discovered what I believe are 3 crucial steps.
Not all will take them, but all who do will move toward the promise instead of the problem. Here they are:
1. Know You’re Hot
God wants you to know how valuable you really are. In fact, he calls you His Masterpiece! Some translations denote “luxury.” You are in God’s luxury line! The finest of His creation, the apex of all his works. Rise up, take a risk—and believe you are a hot, luxurious masterpiece handcrafted by heaven. Careful now, this takes real bravery—but dare to believe it.
2. Stop Hiding
Stop avoiding the truth of who God made you and act: Disciplined. Confident. Radiant. Why not “act as if” you already have the authority that He says you can have? What have you got to lose? Bold faith makes him proud and demonstrates you believe what He says over your emotions.
3. Start Before You’re Ready
Too often we wait to “feel it” before we “do it.” William Shakespeare wrote, “Assume the attitude, though you have it not.” It’s only when we start acting as if God’s Word is true, that we can plan for success.
• Hold your head up high.
• Shake people’s hands with confidence.
• Look them in the eye.
• Act like you already possess the Bible-confidence God says you can have.
As you lean in and do these 3 Steps, you just might erupt in laughter, as I did in the café those years ago, hearing heaven whisper:
“Thank you, sweetheart, for moving your behind.”
1. Bring God into Everything.
By everything, it means every area of your life. Whether that is your marriage, your children, your business, your spiritual walk with God, your struggles, your joys – everything.
2. Program Your Mind for Success.
This includes inputting in greatness to see the output. A simple practice of listening to inspirational teachings (Bill Jonson and Chris Felton are Sandy’s favorite) and even just reading books, even if secular can jumpstart this habit.
3. Be Real and Give Yourself Grace.
Remembering that love always wins, and keeping our heart open to people is the truest path to being more— and being real with people.
“Believe God for a dream that’s so big that you’ll look like a complete moron if it doesn’t happen.” —Sandi Krakowski
Have you ever wondered if you could achieve your dream amidst motherhood? or just how to balance it all? We reached out to Forbes top Social Media Influencer, multi-millionaire and angel investor, Sandi Krakowski on how she built her empire all from her kitchen table with young kids:
1. Do something but don’t do everything.
Even though it’s a nice thought to believe that moms are unstoppable forces of nature, realistically, working 70 to 80 hours per week is a quick recipe for a burnout. Just because we’re not in front of a computer, even if we’re on our phones checking emails, it actually counts as work.
Juggling motherhood and a business is hard enough but pouring excessive hours into just one can take away from the other. It could be about prioritizing, but also knowing your limits and allowing yourself to just be. If you know you can’t handle certain hours, then it’s okay to ask for help.
2. Take Risks.
“Risk” is a tricky word and place to start with but it can also be a launching pad. It may be risky to ask for help at first – whether that’s hiring X number people to do all the other things needed for the job, that is okay. The world won’t fall apart if you weren’t the “one to do it.”
Maybe it’s the other way around, and asking for help with babysitting, help with cleaning the house – that too is okay. And maybe it’s even living for yourself? Going out more. Or defining your own version of self-care like maybe eating pancakes for dinner!
3. Be Present, Be Real & Communicate.
Ever heard of the saying: People relate to what’s real, not perfection? That’s because as cliché as it is, it’s true and that’s what resonates with people. By people, this could even mean with your children.
Unrealistic expectations from society, our home environment, our own experiences can even cause us to pursue perfection and create tension instead of showing vulnerability that can be responded to—even with our own kids.
Overcome the overwhelm and guilt that comes with mom-life! Learn the set of skills and tools you need to not just SURVIVE but build the life you want!